January 25, 2005

by Reb Yudel
Mormons, Muslims and Catholics seek Jewish partner for anti-sex jihad

So who's going to be the Jewish face at the table as the "every-sperm-is-sacred" crowd tries to win over the U.N. to what the Guardian calls a Fundamental union?

Sheikh Yusuf al-Qaradawi is a controversial Islamic scholar who approves of wife-beating and believes in traditional family values. The Mormon church, having abandoned polygamy more than a century ago, believes in traditional families too.

With that much in common, they have joined forces to "defend the family" and fight progressive social policies at the United Nations.

Other members of the holy alliance include Cardinal Alfonso Trujillo, who campaigns against condoms on behalf of the Catholic church, and Mahathir Mohamad, the dictatorial former prime minister of Malaysia who sacked and jailed his deputy for alleged homosexuality.

They all met in Doha, the capital of Qatar, last November for what was officially described as a conference to celebrate the 10th anniversary of the UN's Year of the Family. In reality, it brought together some of the world's most socially conservative religious forces.

Give these guys credit. Enough with the U.N. worrying about global warming and the melting of the ice caps. True believers know that the fate of the world rests solely in the hands of God, and God, omnipotent deity of the world that he is, cares not for glaciers, penguins or the will of man, but only about one thing: sex.

So who will join up this bold alliance? Who will be the Jew who says, yes, terrorism and pogroms are bad, but homosexuality, divorce and masturbation are far, far worse?

Will it be Barry Freundel, who showed his bold interfaith leanings by allying against gay marriage with otherwise anti-semitic Islamicists?

Perhaps Danny Lapin, whose outrage at pornography has led him to quote Hitler.... approvingly, thus upending Godwin's law in a way too perverse to contemplate?

Who would you nominate for this coalition?

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