November 24, 2004

by Reb Yudel
Yeshiva Bochers Gone Wild (pt2)

From former YU student Idealogian comes this cautionary tale of naif-meets-nightlife:

Last week, for the first time in my life, I went to a bar. I mean, I've been in places that have a bar - jazz clubs, restaurants, wedding halls - but I've never actually gone to a place that is a bar. Not really the type of atmosphere I enjoy. But last week, it wasn't really up to me.....

I decided that I'd go but not hang out for too long or drink anything. I didn't want to be a part of the whole "eat, drink and be merry" experience, especially with some people who have a history of taking that creed a bit too far, in my opinion. So I got there at 6:30, left at 7:00, and drank only a glass of water. (I later found out that some of my co-workers didn't get home until 2:00 AM and can't remember all that much about the last few hours before that.)

I told my parents about this over the weekend, and the following conversation ensued:

    My Father: So what'd you drink?

    Me: Just a glass of water.

    MF: A glass of water?!

    Me: Yeah, just some water. With ice.

    MF: New York City, unfiltered water?


I would have been better off with a beer. That'll teach me to stay sober.